Wednesday 8 December 2010

Handle

In another life - a long time ago.. I wrote something one day about the names that people use on dating websites. I also waxed lyrical about the profile photographs that they use to attract members of the opposite sex. (Note : on some websites they are also trying to attract members of the same sex).

A few years ago in the world of CB radio - what you called yourself over the radio was a 'handle'. I think that's quite apt really. Not sure why - it just seems to fit.

Handles I have encountered (and immediately discounted) have included 'white van man', 'digital jedi', 'poleman', 'well hung' (clearly worked in marketing), 'tryingtogetitrightthistime' (smells of desperation), 'fishing freddy', and many, many more.

You can see what it is that these gentleman callers are trying to achieve. They are attempting to entice us ladies with a clue or hint about what their 'thing' is. It does work - but in my case it usually has the opposite effect to what I suspect they intended. It certainly didn't work when I happened across 'tiemeuptonight' and 'whipmetilIbleed'. Harrumph :)

There are also some which are pretty obvious and standard. I have encountered 'Fireman Sam' (and, sadly, he never mentioned sliding down his pole), 'Butcher Boy', 'The Good Copper', 'Jonny the bike' (huge 1000cc Kawasaki...I like a big engine) and 'The Engineer'.

Tonight - however - for the very first time I have encountered the ultimate handle. This one was designed to reap maximum reward for minimum effort. This is clearly a guy with an innate understanding of what turns women on - what lights their fire - and what floats their boat. Once you know this chap's handle ladies - you will be queueing up to date him. I imagine he's a bit like that lovely sexy young man on the 'Lynx' advert...you know the one - all those nubile wenches chasing him across a beach with bouncing boobs and long sexy legs .....

His name?.............. (scroll down)...







SKIDMARKPRINT


Can somebody please run me to the Chemist so I can fill my Prozac prescription? Thanks

4 comments:

  1. Oh my - these guys need lessons from us gays. How's about "Quarterpounder", "The Big Easy", and "Happy in a Harness"? No, on second thoughts, we're just as bad.

    Have to admit I was intrigued by "Fireman Sam." Is he still looking?

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  2. took me a few e-mail exchanges before I realised 'no rabbit required' was bragging.... I naively thought he was a magician...

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  3. That actually name me laugh out loud in the office. Now people are looking at me as if I am a bit strange. :-)

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  4. Spankdaddy's and Hollythemaid's luckily were fairly clear from their profile photos. I emailed them back and thanked them for their kind messages, but that their interests may be a little too niche for me...

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